On February 18th, I woke up a to a text message sent by my cousin Stephanie last Tuesday evening. The message read “I just wanted to let you know Natalie had a brain aneurysm today. She is being declared brain dead. She is gone.” I also had a voicemail and message from my father asking me to call him. In a state of panic and shock, I called my dad who confirmed Stephanie’s message. For some unknown reason, my cousin had a traumatic brain event causing irreversible brain damage and was only alive due to a ventilator. As the week progressed, we garnered small tidbits of information. Her condition hadn’t been caused by an aneurysm but potentially hyponatremia (low sodium) which can cause the brain to swell in excess resulting in death. Natalie was on life support until Saturday February 21st while matches were found for her organs. At 10:30 pm, she officially gave her life so that others could live. She donated her lungs, liver, pancreas, kidneys, and skin/bone tissue. Natalie’s funeral was scheduled for Saturday February 28th in Awhatukee, Arizona.
Brent and I decided to fly to Tucson on Friday night then drive up to the funeral on Saturday. However, nature had other plans. She decided to send ice to Dallas canceling school and flights on Monday that week. Then snow started again on Friday which caused the cancellation of almost every flight that night out of Dallas. Brent found a few flights that were still taking off to LAX and a Saturday morning flight to Phoenix from Los Angeles. He wasn’t hopeful but we wanted to try to do our best to get there.
The airport was an absolute mess. The motivation to support Natalie’s family and pay our respects was the only reason we braved the roads (no plows in Dallas) and crowds of an airport full of stranded people trying to get out. To our surprise, many people made the first flight out of Dallas. We weren’t on that flight, but we thought we might have a shot on the next one. We took the train to Terminal C for the next flight. As soon as the doors opened, I knew we were in deep trouble. Lengthy lines full of cranky passengers snaked across hallways. Brent checked our listing for the next flight when we sat down at the gate. We were #144 and 145 for the flight – Yeah, not gonna happen.
I was distraught at the thought of not making it to Arizona. I wanted to spend time with family to mourn the loss of my cousin. I was also speaking at the funeral, so I wanted to share Natalie’s influence on my life. After checking other options, we knew I wasn’t going to leave Dallas. I texted my family that I couldn’t make it but felt like I should keep on looking. We found a flight for $89 on Southwest the next morning that would get me in to Phoenix for the time of the viewing. This flight wasn’t available earlier when we looked but somehow it was available this time. The next step was to find a return flight home. Every airline wanted half of my arm or leg in return for flying with them. I checked Spirit because I had heard that they offered low cost tickets. We found a fare for $113 but the flight left Phoenix at 2:00 am. It was crazy but it would get me home in time for work. We left the airport after buying my flights glad to be out of chaos.
Being married to Brent has turned me into a complete airplane geek. I went on a date with a guy in Arizona in 2005 who really liked to watch airplanes land and enjoyed identifying the airline of the plane as it zoomed overhead. After the date, I mocked him and his enthusiasm to my family. I need to find him and offer sincere apologies as I now love watching planes land and identifying the livery. Cruel fate; cruel world. Because I’m a geek, I was super excited to fly out of Love Field (i.e, Southwest flies out of a different airport than the majority of airlines in Dallas). I even took pictures on my phone to share later.
My flight was delayed due to deicing, but I made it to Phoenix in time for the viewing. My dad and brother picked me up from the airport and drove immediately to the chapel.
It was wonderful to see family gather from various parts of the country. Even though it was so tragic seeing Natalie’s kids and her husband alone without her, it was heartwarming to know that our family could rally together and provide support. I was able to share some special moments with my Uncle Greg and Aunt Suzanne as well as my cousin Stephanie. The funeral itself was beautiful. There was a feeling of peace and love despite the deep sorrow.
That night, we gathered together as a family and enjoyed each other’s company. I am so grateful for family memories and bonding. Later, my cousin Mindi, Stephanie, and I would stay up late talking about life, trials, and “girl talk.”
I was able to spend Sunday with family again especially Stephanie’s three adorable and sometimes crazy kids.
Her husband dropped me off at the airport at midnight for the best flight ever. When I booked the flight, I thought it would be half empty. Who in their right mind buys a 2 am flight on purpose? I was wrong. Lots of crazy people buy flights at 2 am. I was crammed in back of the plane in a middle seat with no leg room. Of course, there was a baby across the aisle. I love babies but not at 2 am. Our delayed plane finally took off at 3, landed at 6, and waited on the Tarmac until 6:30. Brent picked me up, rushed me home in time for me to shower and head to work.
Here is a link to Natalie’s obituary: http://www.bunkerfuneral.com/obituaries/natalie-zobell-miller/
Just Call Me Zabsher 